Wow guys! It's only been a week and I've already filled all the sessions I was able to donate to the Rainbow Baby Model Call. I actually received so many applications that I was able to donate 1-3 Rainbow Mini Newborn Portrait Sessions per month from now through January 2019!! I wish I could have donated sessions to everyone that applied, but unfortunately there's only so much of my time to go around, especially since I'm a mama to three precious children myself. It's been a hard week reading all of the heartache that you mamas have been going through. I am so overwhelmed by all of your pain! I am a very sensitive person so I have been crying a lot as I read story after story this week. This is a warning to you now--those that received complimentary sessions, I may cry during your session too!! Be on the lookout in the coming months as most of the recipients agreed to share their story on my blog.
I hope you will feel my love and support for you as well. I am here for you and I'm so grateful that I can donate my time to at least some of you that have had such a hard experience in a very meaningful way.
As it is still Infant and Pregnancy Awareness month I also want to take a moment to express my sympathy for those mamas that are still hoping for their rainbow baby. I will pray for you that you may find comfort and healing after the loss that you have experienced. And I hope that you may be blessed with a rainbow baby soon! You have my love!
We thought of You Today
We thought of you today,
But that is nothing new
We thought of you yesterday
And will tomorrow too
We think of you in silence
And make no outward show
For what it meant to lose you
Only those who love you know
Remembering you is easy
We do it every day
It's the heartache of losing you
That will never go away
I hope that we can continue this session donation to mamas in need so please if you know of someone that will be welcoming their rainbow baby after January 2019, please send them this post or have them fill out an application here.
"Rainbow baby is the term for a baby after the loss of a previous child. It is the understanding that a rainbow's beauty does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean that the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds." -unknown
To commemorate Infant and Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month in October I am donating a free newborn mini session along with 10 complimentary digital images to ***3*** families in need that are expecting a baby now (either pregnant now or very recently given birth). "Families in need" could refer to financial hardship or to a particularly painful loss/multiple losses that has caused extreme emotional distress. Ideally the portrait session will take place when the baby is between birth up to 14 days old, but I can be flexible under the right circumstances.
Please fill out your application here.
Please nominate your friends if you know someone who is expecting a baby soon and has previously experienced a loss (miscarriage, stillbirth, infant loss).
Note: I may do this in coming months depending on the response but it will likely be only one family per month in the future. ❤️
This week’s topic is going to be a hard one. October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month in the United States. This refers to any loss of a baby at any stage of development either in utero or after birth and beyond.
One in four women has experienced pregnancy or infant loss. According to the CDC 15-20% of pregnancies in the United States ends in miscarriage or still birth. I am one in four. I hope that by getting my story out there it will help someone else. After having my first two children we knew our family wasn’t done yet so we tried for another baby. And even though the first two were easy to come by, when trying for a third baby I experienced secondary infertility. I experienced an early miscarriage at least once (though I suspected twice). It was so early that I only knew I was pregnant because I had taken a pregnancy test and gotten a positive. I often felt very guilty that I felt so sad because surely other women have had it worse when they have lost a baby further along in the pregnancy. But I did feel pain and sadness and anger. Luckily I had a very supportive doctor who helped me understand that a loss is a loss. I will be forever grateful to her for the time she spent with me comforting me and crying with me and helping me to heal.
I want this blog post to offer support and comfort to those who have experienced loss. I want you to know your feelings are valid. You may feel a lot of different things at different times or at the same time, and that’s okay. You may grieve differently by yourself than with your partner or your other family members. Each person and each family experiences loss differently. There are many ways to grieve but it’s important to feel that grief in order to eventually find healing. Suppressing grief may be easier for now but it’s harmful to your mental health in the long run. Take your time and feel things in your own way.
Here are some tips I found online from a licensed psychotherapist that I believe would be helpful to one who has experienced pregnancy or infant loss:
Any type of loss is difficult but the loss of a baby can be especially painful. You lose the hope of the future your family might have had. There’s now a hole in your life where the baby existed. Depending on the stage of development you may be constantly reminded of your loss and the pain will resurface. You may even feel resentment towards other parents who still have their own children living. That is normal and it’s important that you face those feelings so that you can find healing of your own pain. Seek help from a therapist if you need help to find that healing. Even if it’s not a therapist, talking with someone else about your raw emotions can be cathartic. Even just writing this post I had some feelings resurface but I feel like I acknowledged some of my feelings that I had struggled with in the past and that by writing it has helped me to heal just a little bit more.
As much as it hurts now, it will get better with time.
Healing doesn’t mean forgetting. You will never forget, but you will heal.
I would like to take this little bit of time at the end now to let you know about the “Wave of Light” that is a time for people around the world to remember their children that have passed. It takes place annually on October 15th (two weeks from now) at 7pm local time. It is called the Wave of Light because everyone is invited to light a candle on behalf of the baby you lost and to let that candle burn for one hour as you remember and grieve and heal. Please share this post so that we can all participate in this Wave of Light as we support each other in our grief and healing.
This blog will feature new parent advice, what to expect when working with my business, as well as an ongoing series about safety when interacting with newborns
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